Sitting in an English garden waiting for the sun

As any reader of this blog worth his or her salt shall soon learn via my endless storytelling, I am a server/bartender at Applebee's, a well-known casual dining establishment. Working in the restaurant business is incredibly challenging and truly eye-opening [a topic I will be covering in a future post... stay tuned. You know you're intrigued], and I can honestly say that not everyone is cut out to do it. You can't stick an incredibly shy, modest, introverted person into a typical casual restaurant and expect him or her to succeed. Not possible. Trust me. We learned from the train wreck that was Patty. Or was it Patsy? No, it was Patty. Man, she was strange. Might get a story or two there later.

Meanwhile, let's return to the point at hand. One of my both favorite and least favorite things about working in a restaurant is the constant interaction with so many different kinds of people. There are some WEIRD PEOPLE in this world, folks. You would think that an ordinary, run-of-the-mill casual dining establishment in the Midwest wouldn't attract such a colorful crowd of critters, but ALAS. That is not the case.

Tonight, I had a fascinating table. I was seated at table #25 with two women, both getting on in years, one more noticeably so than the other. [Completely unrelated sidenote: my computer/browser/keyboard?!?! keeps freezing after every other word I type, forcing me to pause until the letters catch up. It's really cramping my style. I think it has to do with the fact that I have approximately thirteen different webpages open at the same time. Note to self: give computer a break every now and then. It will then love you more. Sidenote over.] The woman on the left showed her age through the lines carved into her face, her unevenly spaced teeth, her sharp, bony knuckles. Woman on Right proudly sported frizzy greyish-white hair and wrists boasting no body fat whatsoever. Quickly after approaching the table, I discovered that Woman on Right smiled a lot and needed assistance from Loud Lefty to both read the menu and decide what she wanted to eat. Loud Lefty is thus named due to her tendency to raise her voice when speaking emphatically or to another person.

After taking table #25's order, I got sat [important clarification: I realize this phrase may lead you to question my grammatical prowess. However, I only use this phrase as the 'restaurant biz' term, referring somewhat obviously to the fact that one of the tables in my designated section had become occupied by guests to our humble neighborhood bar & grill.] at table #15, so I turned from #25 to greet the new table, and stopped by #24 on my way back to the kitchen to check if they needed anything. Gathered a request or two from them before prancing on my way and continuing my personal quest to be the world's most charming server. I know, aspirations are astronomically overblown. Upon my return to #25 to check on their salads, after completing all my previously mentioned tasks, Loud Lefty called me back using my name - which, I'm not going to lie to you, dear readers, occasionally weirds me out. I understand that I introduce myself to a table, and that I wear a nametag, and both of these things seem to indicate that I have no problem with my customers knowing who I am.

Whoa. I totally just fell asleep sitting up at my computer. It's tiring waiting for my face to dry so I can safely apply acne medication without burning my skin off. This post is to be continued on the morrow, especially since I just fell asleep AGAIN. DAMN. AND AGAIN. Eyelids... so... heavy... zzzzzzzzzzn

hello, goodbye

I recently discovered a few well-written blogs which inspired me. Perhaps one day I'll inform said blogs of their inspirational force. I've been toying with the idea for awhile, though... a former roommate once suggested that I should create a blog almost as a form of practice for my writing, or perhaps as a method for my voice to be heard. In whatever tiny corner of the Interwebs that may end up being.

So goodnight, dear void. [Kudos, and also a few gold stars! to you if you catch the movie reference.] In the next day or two, I plan on learning a bit about this blogspot thing. I had a blogspot way back in the day (which shan't be linked to here, due to its embarrassing emphasis on lengthy, personal rants. How a person can age in a few short years, eh?), after which I made the switch to Xanga, which was quite pleasant indeed, but again, not quite the blogging situation I had in mind. Therefore, I'm back, and hopefully motivated enough to persist this time. Lord knows my writing needs constant tweaking/practice/constructive criticism.

Ah, tis late. Must get up to work on the morrow. Until later, nonexistent readership. Perhaps sometime in the not-so-distant future, a pleasant blogger or two will accidentally find their way to my words and have a thing or two to say about them.